Friday, December 7

Rocking the Rascal

George: They gave me my own personal Rascal, Jerry.

Jerry: Well, it's comforting to know that you'll be going straight to hell at no more than three miles per hour.

If you ever wanted to travel senior citizen steez, this is your chance. Woot is offering up the Invacare Zoom Blue Scooter for the low, low price of $399. Call it what you want -- we all know it's a Rascal.

All of this time you were walking under you own power, battling gravity like a sucker, when you could have been rolling deep in this beauty. Top speed, 4.5 mph.

I'm thinking of getting one for my trip next weekend to The Villages, a 55 and over retirement metropolis in central Florida (population 68,768). The preferred local mode of transport is the pimped-out golfcart, but maybe I'll change all that.

I've told everyone that I'm going to visit my grandparents (happy birthday Nana!) but in actuality I'm just scoping out the place as my future home. Only 23 years to go! And only 3 years until I can swim in the 35 and over pool. They don't like those raucous 34-year-olds splashing around and making a nuisance.

1 comment:

JDizzle said...

My Nana lives in one of those parks in FL where you have to be over 55 to own property. Beeps and I visited her one year and cruised around in her golf cart. and NO JOKE, there were some pretty fly, pimped out carts. Plus, we got to go swimming in the pool (I don't think there was an age limit) but they did have the "moves" posted for the water aerobics class. We weren't sure what "The Charlie Chaplin" was but tried our best to figure it out. Good times.