Tuesday, September 16

How to Tell That Your Very High Profile Celebrity Engagement is on the Rocks

--No matter how many times you change the station, it seems that every song on the radio is about a breakup between a square-jawed recovering alcoholic and a full-figured crossover pop/movie star.

--You do not feel even the slightest pang of guilt or fear of discovery while nailing a Canadian exotic dancer named Starlight, even when you could have sworn for a split-second that the strobe light by the stripper pole was actually a paparazzi flashbulb.

--Gossip columns have suddenly started inserting a space in the middle of the cute one-word, combination nickname they'd been using for you and your beloved.

--You're increasingly annoyed that the aftertaste from the nipple glue that held up a very famous, revealing, green Grammy dress has not subsided, leaving you with the nagging suspicion that your bride-to-be's hygiene habits could use a punch-up.

--Suddenly that ample ass on your fiancée is starting to look a lot less 'sexy' and a lot more 'fat.'

--The following two phrases find their way into the same sentence uttered by Michael Musto: 'P. Diddy' and 'rebound fuck.'

Link (From Bunsen.tv)

UPDATE: The national nightmare may be prolonged

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